Mullen Christmas -- January 3, 2015

 Every year I'm constantly asked the same question:

"So when, exactly, is Mullen Christmas this year?"

And every year I say the same thing:

"By tradition, Mullen Christmas is always on Saturday at 2pm in the first full weekend after New Year's Day." 

Since Friday is part of the weekend (at least in my book) that means that the earliest that Mullen Christmas can possibly be is on January 3, which is what happened this year.  To prove the historical accuracy of this "tradition", I did a little research, beginning with one of the most memorable Mullen Christmas parties ever held:  the 1997 party at Aunt Pat and Uncle Harry's.

I remember that party like it was yesterday.  Actually, I don't remember too many of the attendees, I have no idea what I ate, and I think I drank some beer, but I can't be sure.  What I do remember, though, is that the New York Football Giants played the Minnesota Vikings in an NFL playoff game.  I have long forgotten the details about many, many playoff games, but the details of that particular game will never fade.  The Giants thoroughly dominated the first half and were cruising to an easy victory.  With less than 4 minutes left in the game, they were up by 9 points and had just forced Minnesota to punt.  The game was, as they say, in the bag.  But in a stunning collapse -- from a franchise that has turned collapsing into an art form -- the Giants ended up losing the game.  But what makes this game so gruesomely memorable is one specific detail.  The Giants' arch-rival, the Philadelphia Eagles, had a truly horrible team in 1997, finishing with a meager 6 wins.  Even so, they managed to stretch a hand from the grave.  Their ex-quarterback, Randall Cunningham, was Minnesota's starting quarterback that day, and he led his team to two amazing scores in the last 90 seconds to defeat the Giants 23-22.

Since there is absolutely no doubt that Mullen Christmas occurred during that game, I looked it up on Wikipedia to confirm that it occurred post-New Years.  It did not.  Wikipedia (which, like the Encyclopedia Galactica, is the source of all knowledge) clearly states that the game was held on December 27, 1997.  Ever nimble, I have updated the answer to the Mullen Christmas question as follows:

"In the modern era, Mullen Christmas is always on Saturday at 2pm in the first full weekend after New Year's Day."

Before leaving the subject of historical  ignorance, let me state that, although Marilynn and I have hosted the Mullen Christmas parties for many years, I cannot answer any of the following questions with absolute certainty:

1. When did Aunt Mary and Uncle Nick first begin the tradition of a post-Christmas Mullen Family party?
2. Was there ever a post-Christmas party while Grandmom and PopPop were alive?  If so, did they attend?
3. What was the last year that Aunt Mary and Uncle Nick hosted the party?
4. What was the first year that Marilynn and I hosted the party? 
5. Who (besides Aunt Mary & Uncle Nick and Marilynn & I) have ever hosted a Mullen Christmas party?

If you know the answers to any of these questions, leave them as comments to this post so that all can see.  Enough of history ... on to a recap of this year's party!

The 2015 Mullen Christmas party was truly one for the ages.  According to Mike Mullen, the Chief Statistician, there were a total of 80 attendees!

The official tally

Somehow, everyone managed to avoid a parking ticket and find a parking spot within a reasonable distance of the house.  The Chief Statistician has also pointed out that if other attendees from year's past had been able to attend this year's party (e.g., Tara), we conceivably could have had 113 attendees!  If that day ever comes, I'll have to reinforce the kitchen floor.

Besides the sheer volume of bodies, there were other things of note:

• The Connecticut Mullens in attendance!  After an extended absence, the Connecticut Mullens were once again represented at Mullen Christmas as Maryann and Eileen (along with Eileen's significant other, Steve) drove down for the festivities.  This prompted a lively debate as to how long, exactly, it had been since their last visit.  Sharon and Mark were convinced that it was no more than 5 years ago.  Eileen and Maryann were pretty sure that it was more like 8 or 9 years ago.  As it turns out, the Connecticut Mullens made their last an appearance in 2005, exactly 10 years ago (proof here).  While we never got a chance to see Steve demonstrate his party trick of deadlifting an economy car, everyone got a chance to look at some excellent old photos of Grandmom and Pop Pop that Eileen brought with her (sample below). 

Who knew Kevin was a dead ringer for Pop Pop?

• Pete Notarfrancesco drinking shots!  A year and a half ago or so, Pete spent some time at a place called the Balkan Camp in the Catskills.  I've seen some videos and read an article or two about it, but it's hard to describe exactly what it is.  Let's just say that it's advertised as "Balkan music, dance and singing classes during the day, Balkan-style partying during the night."  It was at this locale that Pete became acquainted with a beverage called Slivovitz.  For months he had been threatening to bring some to Mullen Christmas.  Well, he did just that and, for the first time in my life, I ended up drinking shots (2) with Pete.  The Slivovitz wasn't bad but the Aquavit which he also brought was obviously intended for a different breed of human.  After drinking a shot I had to quickly down a beer in order to restore my esophagus to working order.  If you missed out on this event, fear not.  We didn't finish the bottles.  I have a feeling there will be a reprise next year!

• The British are coming!  The British are coming!  In a manner not unlike Paul Revere's ride in 1775, this year's Mullen Christmas attendees were given ample warning of the impending arrival of Her Majesty's forces.  Not owning a fast horse, I opted to use Facebook and Gmail instead.  Despite the warning, though, the party was clearly unprepared for the onslaught.  The Davieses (Hannah, Huw, Eli, and Rory Macqueen) came with their own music (a three hour playlist); they came with figgy pudding (which they set on fire with Slivovitz); they came with Christmas Crackers (forcing us to wear silly paper hats); and they came armed with Twiglets, the only known substance that actually makes Aquavit taste good by comparison.  While their were only four of them it seemed as if they were everywhere.  One can only imagine the pandemonium if John and Máire Davies had been able to attend the party as well.  Well, there's always next year!

• The Miracle of the Food and Drink!  While most people think that this particular miracle only works with loaves, fishes, and wine, it clearly works on other substances as well.  For the first time in recent Mullen Christmas memory, we neither ran out of food nor had to make an emergency alcohol run.  When one dish of food was finished another one magically appeared in its place. There was ziti, lasagna, swedish meatballs, roast beef, meatballs and sausages, little hot dogs, vegetables/dip, salad, rolls, and a bunch of other dishes that I never even saw.  And that's not counting the appetizers and all of the desserts.  Regarding alcohol, while we did drink the Mullen's Irish Cream, a bottle of Jameson, a bottle and a half of Bushmills, a half a bottle of Slivovitz 3 bowls of punch, about 4 cases of beer and countless bottles of wine, there was still alcohol left at 12:30am when the last of the stragglers went to bed.  I don't know who prayed to what Saint, but thank you for doing so.

• Oh, the weather inside was frightful!  Snow flurries, sleet, and freezing rain fell most of the day, having a significant impact on the party.  While it had no effect whatsoever on turnout, it caused the football crowd in the TV room to go into a fireplace-stoking frenzy!  At the height of the party the temperature in the TV room peaked at around 90 degrees, causing Brian Mullen, Dennis Erskine and I to escape to the screened in porch to grab an ice-cold beer and cool off.  Even the kitchen, warmed only by the ambient heat from the TV room must have hit 80 degrees.

A tad over-jostled

In Closing ...

In year’s gone by, there were a variety of ways that I got a chance to see my aunts, uncles and cousins.  When I was a lot younger, there were visits to Grandmom and Pop Pop’s and the occasional family gathering at the shore.  As I got older, there were all of the cousin weddings and, for a few fantastic years, the annual Mullen Cousins Picnic and Camp Out at Joe Benco’s house, complete with a bonfire and “Mullen of the Year” plaques!  As everyone’s nuclear family has grown, though, the opportunity for all of us to get together has almost vanished.  As much as you might want to, you simply can’t invite everyone to a shore house for a weekend or to the wedding of a cousin-once-removed.  What we have managed to hold onto, though, is Mullen Christmas.  Yes, it’s loud and it’s crowded, and it's almost impossible to have an in-depth conversation with anyone, but I wouldn’t miss it for the world.  It gives me a chance, however fleeting, to connect with everyone again, even the next generation (damn, has Drew gotten tall!!)  It’s one of the main reasons that I continue to hang onto my house in Cranbury.  So, even though Mullen Christmas just ended, I’m looking forward to seeing everyone again next year.   And this time I don’t even need to tell you when it is.